First of all; Happy late St.Patrick's Day.
No, I didn't do anything. No, I did not wear green. No, I wasn't pinched.
Second; It seems the only thing I have been doing is keeping occupied on the computer by continuing to participate in CC (still no time for RP) and by posting and being active on PH (Plano Hogwarts - http://www.planohogwarts.com/). Of course, I still have to do the whole FarmVille, PetVille, Cafe World and Mafia Wars thing too.
Takes a lot out of my day!
Don't worry, I have been getting out of the house. I like going to the mall and annoying those who actually have jobs. (I want one, really, I swear.)
The thing I regret not doing is taking advantage of the fact that my sister still won't be back from Toronto visiting my aunt until Saturday afternoon, and I haven't seen my mother. It's sad, really, how much I could simply forget about my own mother. I don't mean to forget her, and it's not that I forget about her per se, I guess I just got lazy and don't really want to walk across town anymore to go see her. That, and everytime I see her, I feel like I want to die inside because I feel like I'm never doing any good for her, and showing up sometimes is just as bad as not showing up at all. But I know I can't come every day, especially when Tasha's there - she doesn't like me very much - yeah, her own sister - it's her choice; I tried to bond with her but it seems we really are just that different.
I've been so gapped out I haven't even bothered to do homework during the March Break - something that I always enjoy doing. I just don't feel like it.
In other news...
I have made new friends. Joshua and Elijah.
Joshua's a little wierd, and.. I don't like him very much, but I try my best to keep interested in what he has to say.. (it's really hard!) D:
But.. Elijah! It's like we're able to connect and bond so well. He's been through a lot, as have I. He recently had his 16 year old family dog, Kairos put down the other day (like the 16th). :( I know what that's like losing a pet. I've lost so many pets in my childhood. But anyways.. he's just the sweetest kid in the world.. kid.. I'm saying it as if he was a kid.. he's like early 20's. Anyway! This is what he had to say:
Elijah: It seems to me that you care deeply about the world outside you. That you've come through the ass-end of the horse and you can still love deeply, feel strongly, and you're not scarred beyond repair. That you find comfort in other people, and in the lives of those around you. I think it's part of what makes you feel human, knowing that you're one of many, and you're not alone because of it. You are light and cheerful, and understated. You're not grasping for attention, not even quietly pleading for it. You simply deserve it, and I want to give it to you. It doesn't feel like a chore.
you are kind and empathetic. That you said anything about my dog's passing, and offered to talk about it, and gave condolances was more than this other girl did. She asked what I did today. I said I put my dog down. She said "I'm going drinking on Thursday with Kenneth"
so yeah. You just... you just care more. And it feels like I can not only listen to the problems you have, but also feel heard. I hope I'm correct in feeling that
you listen so well. Not used to it :p
Me: I can bond with you.
Elijah: you can. I like that you can relate like that. That you can make connections. Not many people have that ability - a good strategy to help other people know they're listening.
it's nice. Means there's conversation rather than monologues
I dunno. I just find myself with people who are too concerned with themselves. You seem to have room in you to think about others, too. Rare, imo. I like that in you.
He likes a lot of things about me. Earlier, he said things like, I've got a cute smile, and I'm adorable and hot and stuff. It's not that he's hitting on me though, it's those friendly little compliments that I seem to appreciate more than feel like I'm being seen as an object - which is a really nice change.
Elijah: <3 you're doing really well with all your stuff you know
You seem like you've got coping strategies for the shit in your life, and you're handling your world pretty nicely, in the face of all that's behind you. It's admirable
I think you're special. I think you're quite an extraordinary individual. Modest and kind hearted, with shit going on that you're handling expertly. I think there's more to you that meets the eye, and I think you underestimate yourself greatly.
You're truly an individual. And I like that :3
(He's likes A LOT of things about me.)
I see no reason to not be nice to you. I like you. I think you're charming, witty, intelligent and very companionable. You're insightful and emotionally charged. For all that you've got your shit to deal with, you're handling it, and you make life work for you. You're positive and constructive, and cheerful. I think I like that most of all about you. That you're happy, or exude happiness, even if you're not always feeling it.
I hope to talk to him again today, he truly is an awesome person and an interesting individual.
Well, I truly must go because the sun is about to rise, and I think I really should get a little bit of sleep!
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